Benefits of quitting cannabis
A guide to quitting Cannabis and the benefits associated with quitting weed
Giving up cannabis forum
| Forum Home > Your Cannabis quit journal > Time to stop. | ||
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Member Posts: 5 |
After a night spent in the cell of a police station, an unbelievable amount of fallout since (including a couple of criminal charges) and a relationship with someone I love, adore and just live for, in absolute tatters, yet again, following me causing a one-man riot, seemingly. I dont really remember too much but I do feel like throwing myself off the roof today. Im absolutely gutted and so angry at myself I have decided enough is enough and it ends tonight. To hell with side effects, the continuation of smoking weed is simply going to be so much worse.
I'm dont drink very often but do on occasion and sometimes combine with cannabis. Im bad enough with just booze but the combo with weed is something else. I smoke weed, too much and for too long. It has been sporadic the past couple of years but never actually stopped long enough for a return to some kind of normality. I have found after stopping a few years ago i returned to non-anxiety,no paranoia, better health and actually remembering things (at present thoughts and process' can simply vanish, this is mostly at work and has become a problem)
Tonight i had a small j. This will be my last as it just proved to me if its there, it'll be in a j soon. So much for the emergency stash then...It doesnt work, It has to be cold turkey and i'll keep the ciggies for now but they are next. Right now i'm typing this quite determined, I know whats in store over the next few weeks and i aint looking forward to it all but i know it can only benefit me, in so many ways and i will look forward to the end of the stoned anxiety that occurs too often and is making my life an absolute nightmare.
There are so many other bad issues affected with cannabis, everyone will have their own circumstances but i'm sure many will relate to some of the things i have said. I dont use internet forums as a rule but have been compeled tonight to journal the next few weeks in the hope it may help me and also any others in the same boat.
Here goes...
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Moderator Posts: 157 |
Good luck , I am following . CAT | |
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Member Posts: 5 |
Hi Cat and many thanks, Since my first post, i'm glad (well..sort of..) to report i have stayed well clear of the evil weed, of course it's been a bit of a task as it's always been my best pal in times of trouble and in the past week, i certainly had my fair share of that but i have handled it all better and MUCH more rationaly without being stoned. It is an odd feeling, perhaps the cravings for being stoned have been lessened with all the other bother that was going on in my head, or simply that nicotene itself and not the weed is the real physical dependant. Who knows.
But of course in an idealic la-la world, it would be great to have a nice big j, In reality, i would be back to square one, emotions up and down and my mood all over the place. I know better, I aint stupid and first thing is to stop kidding myself that cannabis isnt really an issue. It is and trust me, almost a week gone by and if i had been smoking, i would not have dealt with the past week in the calmer and by miles, more rational way i have. I am finding sleeping ok..well, i never really been one for "early nights" anyway so not much change to be honest, body temperature is up and down, some weird dreams (superheros coming to get me??) and i have smoked more cigarettes, a lot more, but i'll deal with that in a few weeks. Right now it's about the weed and as i have said, it's going ok so far.
Although this came about on the back of all the trouble mentioned in my 1st post, i did want to quit and always planned..next month, new year..etc etc..total bollox and in my case, it took something dramatic but it shouldnt have and that is a lesson anyone reading really has to listen too. You simply cannot postpone quitting this stuff if you really want to quit. I am fortunate that i havent developed any long term mental issues (seemingly!!) but others (people i know) have and in some cases, within a short time of smoking and now live with all manner of serious mental consequences. The physical damage is another matter but i'm more concerned personaly with what it has been doing to my head.
This is a long post and maybe more suited to someone who has been weed free for a long time, not days, but i will never touch it again. I know myself and that i'm sitting here smiling, shaking my head at my long winded post, just says it all, or maybe i am going off my head and don't realise it as yet (??) but i don't think so.
Talk soon.
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Member Posts: 114 |
Hi Jack, reading your post makes me teary eyed. A lot of it I can directy relate to . I am on only day one of my abstinence from the evil weed. I plan to in the battle this time , one day at a time . Please keep coming back , all the best from Sophie | |
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Member Posts: 3 |
Im on my 18th day Clean after smoking nearly every day for the last 12 years and that was strong skunk. I must admit im finding it quite easy and am really pleased with my progress. I went to one counciling class and one accupunture session. I have a really busy life doing my house up from top to bottom at the moment,Everyone in my family and my partner is really happy with my progress although when i get stressed i still have a slight urge but can never go back to that lifestyle again, wasting my money being the main thing. I feel different in myself, more full of life and more focused. All i can say is think about the people around you that it is also affecting and how much better your life will be after being free of this drug. I still have trouble sleeping and am starting to have wild vivid dreams which I never had before. All in all I am getting there!! Regards Dan | |
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Member Posts: 5 |
Hi Sophie, thanks for your post. I can deal with a couple of police assault charges, i aint been in bother since i was a teenager so a hefty fine should suffice. A pain in the arse but not exactly something to keep me awake, Staying away from weed is a helluva lot more mind-occupying and that aint easy. Over a week and it's funny how the 'want' doesnt subside much, so determination has to be much stronger than the want factor.
A few small changes and routine alterations, especially when getting home from work, like going out a mad cycle or a walk to somewhere has been good, as is having a couple of books and whatever, dvd's and anything really apart from sitting straight down and thinking about getting stoned and doing nothing else with the evening...and keeping my good, but weed smoking pals at arms length for a wee while so a few boring weekends to come:)
It is very one day at a time and i hope whatever you have encountered hasnt cost u you a relationship or anything else too bad, thats the worst but dwelling on stuff is the way back to weed..have to be positive and force myself to be happy with myself, i am in general a happy individual so i trust myself enough to know in a few weeks i will be even more resolute, and so will you. Trust me, it is an effing pest but does get easier each day, i just dont think the 'want' goes away cos being stoned does feel good. It's just the awful consequencies that you have to weigh up. You sound quite sincere and you aint daft, so you'l be ok. I wish you all the best too.
Jack
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Member Posts: 5 |
Ditto. Almost the same length of time and same stuff smoked. Skunk (or somethin equally potent) has been the order of the day for so long. It's a wonder either of us have the mental capacity to use a computer and articulate a sentence after that kind of mind abuse! Money costs is horrific when even the past year is calculated...honestly could have financed a good car, or a much fancier flat etc...incredible..,and for the 'privelage of being wrecked doin nothin?!
I aint been to counseling although did see a psycologist recently, i would appear to be ok and like i said previously, been lucky enough to be still sane...though i do feel quite talkative of recent (yep..hence the long posts...im usu quite short of words and never use internet forums, so thats something else but a big help)
That your family and partner are providing that kind of support is crucial, i couldnt tell my mum or she'd collapse, she doesnt distinguish between hash and heroin (or whatever..) she's not too old but her head truly lives in Victorian times, It is funny but a def no-go for support! And anyone else in my family would tell her, so they are tot in the dark.
I feel, in the past week, a lot more alert at work and it's been noticed...just goes to show and is scary thinking about it, my flat is pristine now and gone are all traces of rizzlas and artifacts relating to weed smoking. Dreams are just nuts, i been chased through glasgows west-end by batman and some other comic characters and woke up couple days ago in a state after a dream about a cat being in the house (?!) that was quite vivid and i spent about 10mins looking for it (and im proclaiming sanity??!) before a coffee and out to work.
It's affected my ex and i got caught with it so often, couldnt have gone down any worse i had been caught in bed with another woman. Yet i just became more cunning and hid it better, that is deceptive and lying about it was the catalyst for a protracted break-up. She might have not seen me with it but my reddened eyes kinda gave the game away...what an idiot...but like yourself, i am getting there and the benefits right now are subtle but increasing each day as is my self respect.
Regards and many thanks for your comments.
Jack
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