Benefits of quitting cannabis

Hi - I've just signed up to this site and have read through some peoples stories.  It's very reassuring to know that others have been through the same process and have stuck with it to choose life instead of the falsehood and haze which we all know.  Big up to everyone who's trying to get there and I really love the kind words and encouragement from everyone...

I've been smoking weed pretty much constantly for the past 15 years or so.  I tried weed before smoking cigarettes and chucked whities so started smoking fags so that I could cope with the nicotine - it was like I was determined to get onto this drug at all costs...I'd hated smoking from childhood and found myself a 20-per day man in no time. 

In my late teens and early 20's I partied hard like lots of people and found myself in a circle of friends that consumed pills, speed, coke, acid and alcohol in huge quantities - strangely these friends are still my best mates 10 years on...no-one died or went mad, but all of them have managed to grow out of drugs whilst I have continued to smoke weed every day since.  I've been clean of other drugs for a long time now, and found quitting them very easy - it was a simple choice as they stopped "fitting" the life I wanted.  However weed is so different as I can smoke it and still function - go to work, hold meetings, write papers, etc...that's maybe why it's so hard to give up.

I hold a very responsible job and my life is pretty good - wife, own home, nice holidays, all the material trappings, etc, etc...but I've never managed to stay stopped (despite numberous quit attempts) and  hate myself for my one vice and feel like I'm leading a double life - the person that everyone sees as successful and responsible, and the "real" me who plans his life around the next joint and then beats himself up for doing it...bizarre behaviour for someone supposedly intelligent, but you know the story.

I'm onto day 3 of quitting now and feeling ok.  I'd never read up on the side effects of quitting and (having now done so) feel a whole world better to know that the strange feelings I'm experiencing are all part of withdrawl.

Nightsweats - check

Depression - check

Loss of appitite - check

Headfog - check

Loss of motivation - check

I often have to work from home at strange hours to get my job done.  I have relied on weed to "ease" this in the past and that's probably the thing I've found hardest this week - I've got so much to do, but can't find the motivation to do it...work is piling up and I'm just staring at my screen not doing it...but having read up on stuff I'm hoping that it's temporary and that I'll find it within me to get back into the groove fairly soon.

I'm not really looking forward to the weekend, as (in the past) this has been where I've fallen down - I get bored and make up some excuse to score and then that's it for me...I hope this time it's different - my plan is to visit this site when I'm clucking for a smoke, read some posts, write some stuff and (hopefully) talk myself out of it - I hope I don't annoy anyone with my rambles!

Anyway, I'll keep posting and will read through some other posts for useful info - thanks for being there...I'm grateful that you have had the bravery to share as it's given me a new perspective and I hope that I can help some of you guys in time in the way that you have already (unknowingly) helped me.

Welcome Addled!

well done on making it to day 3!   In some respects you're through the hardest part.  I'm only on day 13 myself.. pretty much beyond the cravings now...  but now having to deal with the emotional fallout which hopefully won't be as bad for you as you still have a home, career, and your wife..

I lost the first two to weed, and haven't yet found "the one", mainly due to my weed addiction, so hopefully you won't have the regrets and depression to quite the extent that some of us do.  Then again, the mind games the weed plays on you, trying to convince you it's ok to have "just one", may well be far worse... so do look out for those. 

as for the weekend.. if you can afford it, how about taking the good lady for a weekend at a health/spa resort?  (champneys type thing if you're in the UK?)

In one of my previous quits, I found the distraction of uber healthy food, saunas, massages etc really did remove the cravings.  Saunas also help to speed the removal of thc from your system, which can only help.

that time I wasn't prepared for the emotional side of things, and I relapsed after a couple of weeks, but had I been better prepared, I could have probably succeeded back then.

So, again, welcome aboard, and don't worry about rambling! Better out than in!

Addled -

so glad to have you on board!  And Pete is right - you've made it through the MOST difficult part - which is making the decision and then getting through those first couple of days.

Isn't it curious that of all the addictions you flirted with, this is the one that chose you!!  I think there is a lot to that.  Perhaps we are people who are reasonable enough not to succumb to the obvious - but this addiction is insidious.  We were told it was harmless, non addictive - and it crept up on us while we really weren't looking. 

How does the wife feel about it?  Is she willing to joing you?

I have to wonder too if the depression and emotional roller coaster may have something to do with the fact that cannabis kept us somewhat disconnected.  - I know for me it was an immediate coping mechanism.  As  result, I find normal everyday situation somewhat overwhelming. 

Post whenever you can - rant and ramble at will - we will all benefit from it.   The night sweats may continue for a few weeks, which was a real surprise to me.  I'm at 9 weeks yesterday.  Strong urges come and go - and not starting over AGAIN is a huge motivation not to succumb.

Keep quitting!! -

Thanks for the replies guys.  It's 5.30am and I just had an 8 hour sleep - something I was incapable of with the weed.  I had a lot of strange dreams and sweats, but actually I don't mind that so much as I'm telling myself that it's all part of the detox process...so it must be for the good.

Pete - good idea about the weekend, but can't do it unfortunately.  Both the wife and I have too much work on to take a weekend away at the moment - so we'll both be cooped up in the house clucking away!  Nevermind...I'm trying to take a relaxed view to it and think that if I can get through it then I can get through anything - it's always been a Friday night that's got me before.  I'll pick some up and say that it's a reward for staying clean all week - we'll tell ourselves that we deserve it after what we've struggled through and that we'll quit again on Monday...then Monday comes and we don't.  It's so frustrating that you know the patterns, but you just can't seem to help yourself.  I'm trying a little mind-trick this time though in telling myself that this is easy and reminding myself how good I already feel on a repetitive basis - it seems to be working in as much as I'm not panicked in my mind about things.  If I feel weak I'm going to come on here and read some stuff, which really does seem to help.

Pete, I'm really sorry to hear what you've lost through this - that's tough mate, but I think that you shouldn't feel regrets - no matter how much you've lost, you've gained so much.  If you beat yourself up now you are clean surely it's going to reinforce the negative feelings which could lead you down other bad paths.

Grandma - the wife is with me on this.  She wants to quit for her own reasons, but she doesn't see it as an addiction yet.  I'm not sure how that will pan out - whether it's a good or bad thing that she doesn't feel an addict, yet she shares the same patterns as me - wil it make it easier or harder for her to stay stopped?

On another note, one of the links I read in the "useful links" section really resonated with me yesterday.  In the scientific one which Illma posted there were references to seretonin and dopamine imbalances in the children of alcoholics - my dad is a full on alchy who's drinking himself to death.  I've always wondered if there is something passed down, as I've often turned to drink when I've stopped the weed before.  Drinking scares me more than weed, as I've seen first hand how distructive it is - the violence, the loss of respect, etc.  I'm determined this time not to take up something else to replace my crutch - it was very helpful to read all that stuff as the "symptoms" of such imbalances seemed to describe my mental state - I'd never thought that nutrition affected the chemical balances in your brain...I've always thought of food as a body thing.  My diet is rubbish, like most pot-heads, so I'm going to do some research as to what good foods I should be stocking up on so as to make sure I've got all the necessary bits and bobs to make my head work properly - any tried and tested tips would be welcomed, as would advice on how/ where I could get tested for any imbalances.

Anyway, time to get ready for work...thanks again for the replies...

addled -

You sound like you've really got a handle on this.  You know I smoked for 8 years before I realized I was an addict.  It wasn't until I seriously started trying to quit that the full impact of it hit me - so I will be interested to see how your wife does with the quit.

I have to tell you that I was ready to check myself into rehab - which would have been increcibly difficult for me to face on many levels - until I found this sight.  The advice here is sound and has kept me going for 9 weeks now.  It has made all the difference.

Day 6 - all is well.  Did a bit of exercise today and am having a nice night in with the missus...she's doing well too and we're both feeling great.  I had a bit of a wobble first thing this morning as it's a Saturday and normally a wake and bake day for me, but we've kept busy and the wobble was no more than a momentary "what am I going to do all day" thought.  I still haven't managed to settle down to do some work though, so tomorrow may be more of a challenge.

I've got quite a stressful week next week - lots of travelling and meetings, so I'll be away from home and may not be able to post much...but at least I'll be distracted!

I hope you are all doing well...

Day 7 and all is groovy!  I'm still not working, but in a way that's nice as I probably work too much - I've temporarily gone on strike, but hey-ho the company won't collapse because I've slacked for a week.  When I get my mo-jo back and am working again they'll reap the rewards of my not being wasted so it will make up for my "week off".

I've really gone to town on all the positive thinking material and mind-management stuff.  I've always been into that sort of thing, but in recent years have lapsed...mainly becuase I was "content" getting my relief from smoking the weed.  It's only recently where I've felt so negative BECAUSE of smoking that I have felt the need to get my balance back.  I've been re-reading passages from books that hold meaning for me, watching "the secret" repeatedly and doing lots of meditation to put my head into the hyper-positive frame of mind which has made this quit easy so far.  I really hope I'm not annoying anyone who is struggling with thier quit by being so unbearably positive, but it really is working for me.  I'd urge anyone who is caught in the negativity trap to give it ago - all of our "problems" only exist in our heads...things are only a problem or difficult if we think they are.  If we try to look for the positive in any situation and try to look at what we're learning from the experience then all of a sudden (and I mean immediately) things take on a much more positive feeling.  If you then wallow in that positive feeling and try to magnify the feelings of positivity it creates a fantastic high that stays with you for hours.  Anyway...it works for me, and each to their own and all that!

Keep strong...remind yourself that you are really benefitting from getting off the weed...tell yourself repeatedly "this is easy...I'm so happy" and the brain doesn't know any better than to follow suit!

Good luck

Oh - it must be the holiday season,  Life sure seems to get hectic in a hurry - meditation is JUST what I needed  - THANK YOU.  Hope you are still doing well - 10 weeks today for me!!!

Happiness to you!

Thanks Grandma, I hope the meditation brings you everything you want...it certainly does the trick for me.  As I said on your blog, it helps me listen to the "right" voice - it's too easy to get distracted by the conflicts in your mind, but mediation for me helps me tune into the right way of thinking and acting...powerful stuff!

Happy 10 week anniversary!  You've done fantastic!  It's day 10 for me now and still no real problems.  I had a bit of a crazy dream last night when left me feeling a bit battered when I work up, but I feel fine now.  Still really busy at work, but am trying to do a bit of exercise or something active in the evening - that seems to help a lot too.  I've even started to contemplate giving up smoking cigarettes too, which I definitely want to do and will approach with the same level of positivity (as they're all in the mind too) - but don't want to rush into that in case it makes the weed quit difficult.  I'll probably wait until the new year for that one!

Anyway...got to dash...keep strong!

Addled - good luck with the cigs - if you can beat the MJ you can do anything! - Seriously.  Give it a good shot for the New Year.  BREATHE DEEP!! 

Good evening all!  So....it's Friday night, day 12, and I'm feeling fantastic!  I had a situation at work today which has proven to me how far I've come and that all this focussing on positivity etc is REALLY paying dividends.

I usually work from home on a Friday and that usually means a 6am start, roll one up and then smoke all day until collapsing in front of the playstation at about 3pm.  I fear the phone ringing in case it's a customer and I've got to deal with some issue or one of my guys ringing in case there's a problem in the office.

8.30am and the phone rings - major problem at work.  I was able to assess the situation clearly, jump in the car, drive the 50 miles up the motorway to work and dive in to get the problem sorted.  I had stress of an "off the scale" level to deal with, had to liaise with loads of different difficult people and was able to keep a clear and calm head throughout.  Fan-bloody-tastic! 

I would never had been able to do that whilst wasted - I'd have tried to deal with it remotely, then felt guilty for being wasted, got more wasted and had the whole weekend feeling crappy about myself for not being responsible which in turn would have led to more shite feelings and so propogated even more smoking...making a simple decsion to quit and be positive about that decision has led to me feeling bloody marvelous about what I was able to do today (even though it was a stressful and rubbish day, and I have a mountain of work to do this weekend as a result).

Only once during the whole episode (when I realised how much work I've landed myself this weekend) did I think of having a smoke and that thought passed in a millisecond - just a habitual response to the "oh bugger, I've got to put in about 30hrs this weekend" trigger.  I'm loving this.

Thankyou Pete and Grandma for being the rocks you've been - it looks like its just us 3 posting at the moment.  I know I've not been able to post much this week due to how busy I've been...but I've read your posts and wish you both well.

My new meditation CD's arrived today - these cost a few quid as they're quite special.  They use different sound frequencies which affect the "speed" of the brain - the default thinking state of the brain is known as "Beta" state which is where you spend most of your waking time.  These CD's take you through Alpha (slowed down, subconsious level), Theta (REM sleep level) and Delta (Deep Sleep level) - all at the click of a button. 

I'll let you know how I get on - they cost "only" $200 and shipped from the US within a couple of days.  The programme is called Holosync - the way I see it is that I was spending that much on weed each week, so it's a tiny price to pay for something which will give me endless benefit.  There is free stuff on the web/ itunes (look for binaural beats) if you're interested...but the compression rate of downloads affects the frequencies so they're good but not fantastic.

Anyway guys and girls...keep strong.  I hope whoever reads my blog (whether it's the usual suspects or newbies) can learn that it is possible to quit this crappy drug AND feel effing brilliant at the same time x

Addled - so glad you checked in and that things are going well for you.  Like you, I feel a sense of responsibility to be here and do what I can for anyone else, since this has been such a huge source of encouragement for me.  What you said to Pete is certainly how I feel - we are "in the right place at the right time". . . the universe does provide!   This forum was actually started within a day or two of the time I was really ready to quit.  In desperation I 'googled' something like "Cannabis quit support groups" and found a couple - though this small group suited me best.  Everyone has been so respectful, kind and HELPFUL. 

I'm making slow progress with the meditation - I have a hard time prioritizing it into my day.   But it is very helpful - I've only made it through the first two CD's - so I'll work with that for a while before I try your new program.

I'm glad this is taking you where you need to be.  Cat, the girl who started this group, keeps in touch with me and will be posting soon - but she was mentioning that her research says that it can take up to a year for your brain to 'reorient' itself after addiction.  That seems very logical to me.  She also said she would post some research about a conncection between addiction and nutrition.  I hope the future brings more research on the long term effects of cannabis use - especially since it is now pretty much legal in many parts of the U.S. and as use increases I have no doubt that the addiction end of it will rear it's ugly head.  Rehabs for it are already surging in numbers. 

It would be great if you and Pete could hook up in London - I should be visiting some time next year and would love to take everyone out to dinner.  You've been a huge help and inspiration to me.  I know there are many who read without posting and I'm always hopeful that we're reaching others out there who will want to join us. 

Week 10 is okay - Life has it's moments, just as you pointed out and hiding behind cannabis didn't really serve us well.   It's quite reassuring to know that there is still someone home in my soul other than the drug addict!

Keep quitting - post when you can

HUGS

Grandma

!

Hello All,

Today is my first day on this forum and my second day clean. I have been a chronic smoker for almost a decade. I tried to quit once before for a possible job but after three weeks when I found out I wasn't getting it the first thing I did was run right back to it. I'm not going to lie I keep a positive attitude most of the day as the both of you have but sometimes I get a little down. If anything just disappointed with myself that it took me almost ten years to realize the path I was going down.

I thought I was on top of the world...full ride to college...great job etc etc etc. Meanwhile I had this constant skeleton in my closet. I would leave fun family or work related events just to go home and smoke. I would spend an entire weekend smoking and playing video games and in my mind I thought I was happy.

Since quitting I have decided to start a fund where I will put all of the money I would be spending on weed. I will also put the money I get from selling my gear which should be sold off entirely as tomorrow. After a while I will take that money and use it for something I enjoy...perhaps a ski trip.

I find that reading forums helps and I am really happy I found one with a current date as most of the ones I have been reading are from 2008 and prior. I hope you both are still doing well. I know I have a very long road ahead of me but I feel as if I have been enlightened and empowered. I finally have control of my life again!!!

Ady - Hope you will stay with us - actually this forum was only started earlier this year and several people have quit and moved on.  I was pretty much where you were until September of this year.   It seems that '10 years' is a trigger for many of us - when we realize how much of our lives we've given up to it. 

The first few days are always the hardest - but if you've even got past DAY ONE you've madea HUGE step.  I've been clean

for almost 3 months now and am truly amazed that I made this happen after trying SO MANY TIMES and failing.

Please stay with us - start your own journal.  It has made all the difference for me.  It will help you and it will help others who are thinking about going down this path.

STAY STRONG - It's WORTH IT>>>>

and there are at least a couple of us who check in here every day - so feel free to rage if you need to - we can take!!!!!

KEEP QUITTING!:)

Grandma

Just wanted to say thanks for the kind words and I took your advice and am in the proccess of writing my own journal. Hope to be done with the first entry soon

Hey addled... just seeing how you're getting on? hope things are well for you!

Pete

addled -  Is everything alright?